Subspace: The Final Frontier?

What is subspace? It is something I hear discussed a lot but I don’t think I’ve really experienced it. It is one of those things that people say if you don’t know for sure that you’ve gone there, then you haven’t. So if that is the case, I haven’t.

Here is Urban Dictionary’s definition:

In a D/s relationship, that very special place the submissive enters when he/she totally trusts his/her Dominant, and totally immerses in an intense scene. The sub may not be capable of making rational decisions about his/her safety and well-being at this point. 

It is the responsibility of the Dom to provide for the welfare of his/her sub, as he/she has trusted him to do. It is also the Dom’s responsibility after the scene to help the sub to return to “vanilla space” after the scene. This entails providing both physical and emotional assurance to the sub, until he/she regains his/her sense of self, and is known as, “aftercare”. 

Some describe it as an out of body experience. The scene gets so intense physically and/or emotionally that you go into a different headspace and totally zone out. A feeling of “floating” or “flying.” The pain of the spanking becomes blurred, some sensations are dulled and others heightened. Letting go to a point where you stop thinking and all you do is feel. I’ve heard it described as a chemical reaction. Spanking produces endorphins which give you a high. Pain produces adrenaline which partially suppresses the pain, allowing you to take more. The two in combination help create a euphoric state.

It seems to be an end goal for a lot of people. I know it’s something I’d like to experience. I’ve had some intense scenes and some very emotional ones but haven’t experienced anything quite like what I hear described by others. But it also seems to be a little different for each person. It’s not easy for me to get to a point of completely letting go. The spanking would probably have to be fairly long to get me to that point, and the spanker would need to be able to really get into my head. It seems to be one of those things that have to just happen, be with the right person and under the right circumstances. Then if the planets all align, one can achieve subspace. Is it an unreachable goal? I don’t know. I’ll keep you posted if I find out otherwise.

On a different note, this is my 50th post! I wasn’t sure where this blog would take me when I started it back in February and I’ve really loved writing here. Thank you to all who have read, all the other bloggers I’ve interacted with who I also enjoy reading, and all the lurkers too. 😉 I hope you’ve all enjoyed it as much as I have!

About Lea

I'm a shy bottom with a sharp wit. :-)
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11 Responses to Subspace: The Final Frontier?

  1. joeyred51 says:


    Congratulations Lea. I have read every one of your 50 posts and have enjoyed them all. Bravo.
    On the subject of subspace, I entered it once during a spanking by an incredible lady. It was not my longest or hardest spanking, but I hope I will experience subspace again.
    Again, thanks for many, many memorable and witty posts.



  2. Mikki says:

    Congratulations Ms Lea on 50 wonderful posts! I haven't read all of them, most… and I have never come away without either agreeing or learning something!

    Thank you for all your insight!


  3. sarah thorne says:

    Congrats on your 50th post!

    Subspace – well, for me it is not necessarily an end point I strive for. I have experienced it on 3 separate occasions that I can think of offhand. One was a result, really, of over-stimulation. I sorta — drifted off, and don't actually recall a certain portion of my spanking/activity (which was very sexual in nature).

    The second time it happened, it was a punishment. It was so intensely painful, that my body, in order to cope, blocked out some stimulation. RG was talking to me, but I did not hear him. When I did finally hear him, processing what he was saying was slow, making my body move to obey him was like moving lead. My sense of time was off. Afterward I had a total calm, but also needed a lot of physical touch and cuddling.

    The third time, same thing…..I drifted, and for about 3 days, I was very, very clingy. (And I am not really a physically needy person at all)

    It's an okay experience, but it's not something that I strive to make happen. I think that is because, for me, I have a need to feel 'in control' of myself and my functions, and in sub space, you really aren't.

    You have to be careful, too, who you allow to take you to that level. There are guys who seriously take advantage of it, knowing full well that one is incapable of making rational decisions, and then they say later in defense, “well, she's a grown woman and didn't say no, so it is her responsibility.” That's a downside, for sure and I have heard of it happening on more than one occasion.



  4. congrats lea on 50 🙂 well done. Ive not experiences subspace either – it sounds enthralling but i agree with you something that can be achieved only when the planets all align so to speak…perhaps one day 🙂


  5. Pink says:

    First: congrats on 50 posts! I love your blog and it seems like you've been around longer. (In a good way!)

    The first time I went to subspace, I didn't know it. It took some convincing. The second time, afterward, I definitely knew because every detail was foggy and I felt utterly blissed out. It is hard to describe and I think it's different for everyone, as you say.

    One thing that I always need afterward is a warm blanket. For some reason I get so cold — almost like shock.

    Anyway…I don't have any advice for achieving it. Some help I am, huh?


  6. Hermione says:

    Congratulations on your fiftieth!

    Subspace is elusive for many of us. I may have been there once or twice but it was nothing like flying or floating. Just blocking out the pain and letting go, being “in” the experience instead of outside watching. As you say, it's different for each of us.



  7. Meow says:

    Congrats on 50 posts! Never been to subspace but will keep exploring (boldly) those new frontiers! Thanks for bringing this subject to us. It's fun to read about other's experiences.


  8. Lea says:

    @joey, No, thank you, and I appreciate your continual support of my blog. 🙂

    @Mikki, Thanks! I'm glad you get something out of reading it.

    @sarah, Thanks for sharing your experience on the subject. I agree with you that one would want to be careful on who they go there with.

    @kiwi, Thanks! Yes perhaps one day the planets will align. 🙂

    @Pink, Aww thank you! I'm not quite looking for an answer, but it is interesting to hear other's perceptions on the subject.

    @Hermione, The idea of it intrigues me, but maybe I've built it up in my head to be something better than it would actually be. Thanks for sharing your experience.

    @Meow, Thanks! It is fun, probably why I spend so much time reading blogs. 🙂


  9. Season says:

    Hi Lea! Thanks for nominating Blossom & Thorn on the Spanking Bloggers Network. Even though we aren't currently eligible, we are honored you thought of us!

    I've hit subspace from time to time. It's not a goal or anything, but when it happens it feels to me like an endorphin high. Time can't be judged – is it standing still? Moving fast? Going slow? I just know I am completely in the present moment and nothing else exists.


  10. Rayne says:

    Congrats on all 50 fabulous posts! 😀

    I never thought I could get to subspace, but eventually I did, and have been there many times, sometimes more deeply than others. It is very much a floaty feeling for me, where my head goes a little foggy and I don't want to move much.

    How I get there varies — whether it's through a specific physical experience (like flogging tends to take me there, as it is almost like getting a massage and I don't have to think about anything else), or through an emotional release.

    I hope you find it one day, and that it is an enjoyable experience for you! 😀


  11. Lea says:

    @Season, I do love your blog but also thought it would be tacky to nominate myself. 😉 Thanks for sharing your experience with subspace.

    @Rayne, Thank you! I would imagine a lot of factors would have to line up. How connected I feel with the top, my current mood and emotional state, the intensity of the spanking, etc. If I ever do find out, I'll certainly share the experience, that is if I can remember it!


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