Just Can’t Get Enough- Depeche Mode (1981)
Mountain Weekend: Chapter 3
Saturday had arrived on the mountain and I actually made it to breakfast in time. Okay, so maybe I was threatened the prior night that I better be there no later than 10:30 am. In any case, I made it. I started my day with 2 servings of vegetables (aka coffee) and had something to eat. Then it was time for St. Margaret’s Academy. The shock from the prior night that I do indeed own a skirt continued as I wore one a second day in a row. Yep, it happened. Probably won’t happen again. Lol. We headed down to the Academy led by a hilariously crazy Canadian bus driver. Astonishingly, we made it in one piece.
Classes commenced and involved all sorts of wannabe nuns, lots of 80’s makeup (think Mimi on Drew Carey), and tops coming up with more ridiculous reasons to get us in trouble. I sadly forgot my disguise from September so attended as myself, which was unusually safe. I was complaining about how Mr. G had been banging on my door that morning and that a man should never wake a woman up. Or even talk to her within a half hour of her waking up. Somebody back me up here! He tired of my whining and took me into a booth and pulled me over his knee. He spanked me and told me that I better come find him later that night because I had another one coming. And people wonder why he’s nicknamed Grumpypants…
The activities resumed and included some bad attempts at rapping and poetry. Mine should’ve been a bit better as I’m the queen of parodies but it’s much harder to come up with something in a limited time frame. Joey did a really good job though. 🙂 Then there was some 80’s trivia in teams of tops vs. bottoms. I know what you’re thinking. Don’t tops always win? Well this time they did not. My team won because we were awesome. There was also a sneaky switch who tried to change teams partway through leading to a rematch, but whatever, we were clearly going to be the winners anyway.
I got spanked by J, who I’d surprisingly never played with before. He’s a really nice guy and we laughed a lot. Everyone went upstairs for dancing. I always sit this part out as to not injure myself or others or the ceiling beams, but it was fun watching others attempt moonwalking, flash dancing, and slam dancing (Youtube it, I’d never heard of it either.) After some people had worked up a sweat and removed half their clothing, Ahem, we went back down to the lounge for pizza. After lunch was one of my favorite parts of the weekend. The Saturday jam session where people can sing and play their instruments that they brought. A few weekends back, I attempted to play the keyboard but was quite rusty, so now I hang around as a singer.
Several of us stuck around to sing and some played guitar. My friend A had written a great parody of “Losing My Religion” by REM. One of the lines of the chorus was “That’s Lea in the corner…” Lol. That was fun to sing. A lot of the stuff in the songbook is older music that I really don’t know, but when I pointed that out I was told I was free to compile my own songbook and make copies and bring them for everyone. Challenge accepted, Mr. R. When I show up in October with the entire ‘N Sync discography, I don’t want to hear anyone complaining. He said I could.
Once the real music session was done, we turned to fake jamming. L had brought along her Playstation and Guitar Hero 80’s edition so a few of us played that. I pretty much rule as long as the level is set to medium. I don’t do that orange button shit. I can’t understand how anyone plays on Expert level unless they have 5 fingers plus a thumb. It’s craziness. After all the music had wrapped up, I got a massage from my friend A. I’ve never had a real massage from a massage therapist before and now I see how people say it’s addicting. And not having to explain your bruises to the masseuse? Can’t beat that! Then I went back to my room to get ready before dinner. No skirt for that night.
Saturday night was the big 80’s party but I wasn’t in costume. I figured I’m from the 80’s and was coming as myself so that would work. A few friends tried to help me out by equipping me with a pink headband and some jelly bracelets. Everyone met for dinner in their outfits. Ms. M and Mr. R showed up and looked incredible, dressed to the hilt in costume of Phantom of the Opera, with a less than happy ballerina trailing behind who also looked beautiful. There was a damn salad in front of me at dinner again but I got someone else to eat it. The rest was great. The staff had gone all out with the dinner that night and the chef got a standing ovation from everyone. The Phantom of the Opera soundtrack provided the background to our meal.
Once dinner was done, people shuffled down to the lounge. New people to the weekend got their official welcome and then the party followed. A lot of folks went all out in 80’s garb. I haven’t seen that many side ponytails since the first grade. I think this weekend spiked Aqua Net sales nationwide. There were Blues Brothers and Madonnas and lots of big hair. Does anybody really miss the 80’s? Lol. I had fun playing with some of the snap bracelets that were lying around. I found that I had a really hard time getting it to snap around my own wrist but it was easy to hit someone else with it. Don’t worry, I’m not turning into a switch.
I ended up in the cubicle with the really tall chair again with E. I was much better at emptying my pockets first thing so that my phone didn’t hit the ground breaking apart and sliding into someone else’s booth like in September. Ah, the debacles of clothing removal. I leaned across him as he sat in the chair and spanked me with his hand. After I was sufficiently pink, things wrapped up and we hugged and returned to the party. I hung out near the bar exchanging awful jokes with J from the resort. He always cracks me up. Some people were very into trying to figure out how to solve the Rubix cube. There were a few of them around as 80’s props. I’ve never been able to figure the damn thing out. Someone attempted to explain the pattern to solve it, but it was far too difficult for me.
I was chatting with B who was dressed up all Miami Vice-like in a white suit. Or Canada’s version of Miama Vice anyway. Lol. He looked nice though. We went back to play and once over his lap, he commented on how I wasn’t bruised like I usually am. He helped give me a little color (so nice of him, right?). Tops are helpful like that. That wrapped up and we hugged and returned to the party. Some people were still in a craze over the Rubix cube and very adamant at explaining to everyone around how the pattern worked. Though they were kind of cheating because it was being solved by assistance of the codes on their phone. Ahem. I still could never solve the damn thing though.
Mr. R grabbed me and took me back to the room from the previous day, which had been transformed from Sloth’s dungeon into the Phantom of the Opera theme. It still had the low head clearance though. Are people trying to kill me or what? This is where I said something really, really stupid. I said I was happy that at least he was empty handed. Think that lasted long? My jeans came down and I went over his knee. He spanked me with his hand and also commented on my lack of bruising. This was being noticed by everyone because it’s quite unusual for me. Usually by Saturday, I’d be completely purple. I wish it was because I’ve gotten tougher, but that was certainly not the case. I told him I was hardly marked because I hadn’t played much. He asked why and I said I don’t know, maybe I’m just not popular this time. He asked if I’d gotten any referrals and I said yes, but I don’t ever turn them in anymore. That was the wrong answer.
He told me to stand up and bend over the chair. He left the room and came back with the FES (Flesh Eating Strap if you’re new here) in hand. #*%! He told me to put my elbows on the chair and not move as the strap came down hard. I moved, nearly leaping up from the chair upon impact.. I couldn’t help it! It’s like telling someone “Don’t think about zebras.” What do you think the first thing to pop into their head is going to be? God damn zebras! I quickly put myself back in position as he scolded me for moving. The strapping continued and I tried to stay in place but still squirmed some. My bottom was on fire. He said that I better complete all my referrals by the next day and he didn’t want to hear from me again that I don’t do them. I sniffled that I was sorry and got a big hug.
I went outside to get some air and almost decided to just call it a night and go back to my room. I’d felt kind of shitty all night and in an off mood. My friend L came outside and we talked for a minute and then ended up going back into the party. She is a total nut and really cracks me up. I stuck around for a while longer and am glad I did because I laughed a lot. The Rubix cube insanity continued at the bar and a few people said goodbye because they were heading home early in the morning. The line of the night was “Where I am?” Rofl, I’m still laughing thinking back on all the little things. I eventually went back to my room and was up forever writing. My brain will never turn off when I’m there. If only I had a laptop, I wouldn’t be typing all this 2 weeks later. More to come!
To be continued…